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Marriage tuned up at Shaw

  • Published
  • By Master Sgt. Cohen A. Young
  • 20th Fighter Wing Public Affairs
HILTON HEAD, S.C. --  More than 20 military couples gathered at the Crowne Plaza Hotel in Hilton Head, S.C. March 30 for a marriage care retreat sponsored by the 20th Fighter Wing chaplain corps from Shaw Air Force Base, S.C.

The marriage retreat was held over a span of three days and is one of many that the chaplain corps sponsors throughout the year. The unit currently sponsors more retreats and seminars than any other base in the air force, said Chaplain Capt. Kathy Scott, a chaplain with the 20th Fighter Wing,

The program is not meant for struggling couples in danger of staying together, but meant for couples in search of a tune-up, Scott continued.

"It's a marriage enrichment program, it's not meant for couples on the brink of divorce because they would be in need of one-on-one counseling," said Scott.

Couples are presented with videos and various topics for discussion and then prompted to conduct exercises where they must speak to the group or just to one another.

"They give us topics and force us to sit down and discuss different topics and it's awesome," said 20th Communications Squadron Airman 1st Class Corbin Truesdle, a participant at the retreat. "The knee-to-knee exercise makes us hold hands and look into each other's eyes and listen to one another."

For some this was a great experience because it pulled them away from work and family and it was just a chance for husbands to bond with their wives as one.

"The homework was the best part of the weekend because it gave us a chance to hold and talk to your wives and be away from everything else and concentrate on each other," added Truesdle.

"It's an intimate environment where tools are given to couples to help refine their marriage," added Scott. "It runs the gamut in terms of marriage life experience because we have one couple that has been married less than a month and another couple that has been married for 24 years."

Divorce rates continue to increase as well as deployment commitments, which sparked the Air Force to come up with something to aid our families, said Scott.

"After being married for 18 years and five children, my husband and I were excited to attend this event," said Loribeth Matter, a military member married to another military participant and currently assigned to the 20th Operations Support Squadron as an Airfield Manager. "It's awesome the Air Force is thinking of the family system and not just the jets; strengthening our family enables us to be better at our job."

Retreats like this one have been greeted with much success and as a result, the unit was recently awarded $51K from the Air Force Chaplain Corps Chapels.

"It feels great to be awarded this money; it means that our command is confident in our ability to conduct these seminars," said Scott.

By the end of the three day retreat, couples have been introduced to many new tools that enable their marriage to flourish away from the base.

"From Friday evening to Saturday, you can see the change and benefit of this training," said Scott. "We try to get away from the children, family responsibility and Sumter, so the couples can concentrate on themselves and work on developing their relationship."

At the conclusion of the weekend the couples were given the opportunity to renew their vows and reestablish commitment to one another.

"I feel like I'm seeing positive change and I'm empowering them to have better opportunities to connect and give them some tools to execute that," added Scott.